The Creative Potential of Exhaustion
I often get asked about the deep tiredness and exhaustion that arises within the journey of embodiment, it seems to me to be a regular and potent juncture to meet along the way. These days in isolation I have been strongly oscillating between creativity and deep exhaustion, whilst also observing those around me step out of their normal comfort zones, finding new beautiful ways to creatively express their hearts. These waves are revealing a deeper understanding of the potential of exhaustion in birthing beauty through the ripening of Pure Creativity.
For me, exhaustion began with a very necessary slowing down of the hamster Wheel. A strong need to step off society's self-sustaining treadmill of consumerism. For many, sickness or a dramatic shift in life circumstance comes light a thunderbolt from nowhere to initiate this Sacred Stop. But it's not easy to actually listen and stop at this point. Because let's be honest, once that hamster starts rolling it's pretty hard to stop the speedy little bugger.
This moment can feel similar to suddenly pulling the brakes on a high-speed Virgin Pendolino train and only then realising there were a bunch of faults with the vehicle.
Personally I have had a few of these wake up calls over the years. Each one gently inviting a shift from doer-ship into Being. Letting go of the "one that is doing something" happens over a gradual period of time, and for this shift to continue our investment in relaxation is key.
It's import to note that rest and relaxation are not the same. Rest is the passive experience of allowing the body-mind to regenerate and restore, for example, sleep. Relaxation is an active engagement of conscious letting go and increase of ease within the body. (Come join my restorative yoga classes to find out more!)
But the challenge within our current culture is that relaxation, moving slow, and not doing anything is often seen as weakness. Thanks to Covid19 this is beginning to change! The moment we stop seeing exhaustion as a weakness we begin to harness the potential of this mystical messenger. Ladies who currently practice menstrual cycle awareness will know exactly what I mean, as during menstruation the potential for shifting from doing into the experience of Being is highly exalted. A highly (silent) creative time for women.
At this point, we learn exactly how our own individual being enjoys relaxation. Exhaustion becomes a gift in coming home. As we let go of the fight against it we begin to taste the undeniable sweetness of enjoying being completely alone (another reason why society has feared this kind of stop). This is so much more than 'filling your cup', it is a return to source - the growing beauty of being plugged into the silent stream of infinite creative potential.
To believe your creativity is limited to the manifestation of personal will does a great disservice to your human potential.
When creating from a place of doer-ship our capacity is limited and it often becomes a task that needs to be accomplished with effort, rather than a joyful expression of Being rooted in relaxation. This latter is void of any force or personal agenda.
Right here we begin to tap into joyful creativity that is limitless and infinite. The revelation of Divine Will as appose to personal will. And this flow of creativity is an absolute mystery to the human mind. It is an embodied unfolding that gives voice to those that are willing to stop (often) and listen. A deep listening develops, beyond the limited personal sense of hearing. A constant ear to the ground. What is heard from these depths is always that which is beneficial. Not only for the creator but beneficial for all beings.
So it can be said that exhaustion is an indication of the next layer of separation from that deep and full relaxation into joy - the creative source that unites all beings on ground level. The heart of hearts, alive, full and throbbing with endless potential.
Of course, it demands a lot for the body to welcome these rounds. Kinda like God sitting on your head, bearing down on your body, while your mind squeals it's way into silence!
And only from that silent empty container of your Being can true Divine Creativity be known and expressed.